COEXIST in Portland?

Anyone who lives in Portland has seen about a million Subaru hatchback type sporty station wagons with a bumper sticker that says COEXIST. Or maybe the one that says KEEP PORTLAND WEIRD, and that one might be stuck on upside down. Too cute. Usually this is a person I am cursing out in my car as I come to a screeching halt behind them because they have stopped at an unexpected spot on a street, perhaps to let a person who is still on the sidewalk, to cross the street - as in, they are not even at the curb yet. Anyway --

Sometimes I want to tell Portland to grow up and other times, liked today, the day my parents flew back to NJ, I want to give Portland a wet, sloppy kiss.

Yes, my parents and I had a fun trip and we did more than coexist, we had fun. We have - what I'd call - a healthy, adult relationship. However...they do live like college students instead of retirees. Instead of waking at 5 or 6am, like lots of people in their peer group, they sleep in. Plus, they stay up late. A couple times I told them I was off to bed at 10 or 11, while my mom barely waved goodnight while fixing herself some raspberry sorbetto.

They slept right through my dog's emergency pee/ yard visit at 3am and then her second wake up call at 6am. They usually were still in bed after I returned from a 1 or 2 hour morning dog walk at Tabor with friends. A. would run in the house with her tail wagging and hop on the bed, invariably kissing my mom then licking her pillow, which she found distasteful and which I secretly enjoyed.

One of the sweet things about this visit is that on June 28th my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. As my dad repeated to anyone within earshot, "Offer your congratulations or your condolensces. Either or."

We had dinner at Southpark, which I chose because of the fresh seafood. My mom ordered the butternut squash and my dad, the chicken. The meal was lovely and then we embarked on a walk around a few park blocks until my dad's bad leg kicked in and we headed back to the car.

During this walk I asked them some questions about how they met. Below are a few snippets...

Me: Let's talk about your wedding.

Mom: It's on a V8 then we put it on a video. Now we have to put it on a DVD. But how?

Me: You mean a Super 8? A V8 is a drink made of vegetables.

Mom: Will this go on your blog? I think you're making fun of us.

Me: Mom, I remember you said you met two other guys at the Hamptons that same weekend you met Dad.

Mom: That was a good weekend. And actually, I dated three guys for about two months.

Me: Nice!

Mom: One was a resident at the hospital I worked at. He dated a lot of girls and married a nurse. Another was a stockbroker. And then your dad.

Me: So you were dating two rich guys and you chose dad. I like it.

Dad: Oh you don't even remember the stockbroker's name.

Mom: Yes I do.

Me: Maybe you can call him up and invite him over to share a V8?

Dad: Didn't one take you on a plane over Manhattan?

Mom: Mm hm.

Me: Why dad?

Mom: You've seen the picture of when we were engaged. He was handsome.

Dad: Was.

Mom: Well you were younger. And you're not going to believe this but on our dates he listened. He really listened. You know a lot of men can't listen or don't listen well. And you're dad seemed to really do that.

Me: Are you sure?

Dad: She didn't seem to care that I was late all the time!

Mom: I don't mind waiting at a restaurant. Not out on the street.

Dad: No, not the street! But I couldn't believe it! I'd show up late and she wouldn't give me hell. I thought to myself, now this is really something.

Me: Yeah, you found a sucker.

Dad: Exactly.

Mom: Once we went to that place. The French Shack? Is it still there?

Dad: I have absolutely no idea.

Mom: Well there were two doors.

Dad: That's right.

Mom: And anyway, we went in the wrong one.

Dad: I remember that.

Lately, my dad's hearing is so bad I like to use this example below, the scene is inside a car:

Mom: The light's green!
Dad: You like hazelnuts too?

But during this walk, talking about how they first met, he heard every word. Each one.